Sometimes you gotta think things through

I'm sick. Have been since Friday. I don't know what it is, but I blame my little germ-ridden, virus-spreading offspring. Despite my best (most neurotic) efforts of washing my hands and ingesting all sorts of anti-sickness herbs, vitamins, and minerals, I knew I was doomed from the start. Resistance is futile, but highly entertaining, I'm sure.

For a moment on Saturday, I thought my extra rest and herbal concoctions had gotten me off easy. However, by late Sunday I knew I had just experienced a brief intermission before the main event struck me. I spent the better part of both today and yesterday in bed. And when I wasn't in bed, I was shuffling around the house in my sick clothes. Miserable. Bored.

I hate being sick because I drive myself crazy thinking of all the stuff I could/should be doing if I weren't sick. And then as I start to feel better, I feel even more irritated with myself when I look back and see all the time I wasted just laying around feeling sick! That just leads me to look back even further and see all the time I've wasted in general. Not when I was sick, just when I was slacking or putting way too much effort into something that turned out to be fruitless or unimportant.

I've been saying I'm going to release a new CD now for approximately FOUR YEARS. I've been recording songs for said "new CD" for even longer. Some are finished, more are in various stages of being done, and then others are new(er) and haven't even been recorded yet. No money. No time. No motivation. I'm sick.

Hey, I'm still writing though. Like these few lines that just came to me the other night...

Sometimes you gotta think things through
To discover the hidden truth
The triumph in a tragedy
What is lost in a victory
It's not always black and white
To be admired doesn't mean you're right
Sometimes the greater good
Doesn't feel as noble as it should
Even a wise man plays the fool
Sometimes you gotta think things through